2021.10.16 04:50 omg_imGay uh oh
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2021.10.16 04:50 Firefoxexplorer What if we just accepted being nervous and stopped trying to pretend
I have had the "fake it till you make it" mentality for a long time. I think it has helped me push myself to do scary things and grow, but I find the constant shame doesn't go away, and I feel detached and confused rather than authentic and myself. The worst thing is when people point out that I seem nervous when I was trying my best to hide it. I get SO frustrated and embarrassed. I get nervous about being nervous, insecure about being insecure, and when it gets pointed out somehow I suddenly feel so small.
I was at an interview today and the interviewer told me part way through "you don't need to be nervous". FFS, why do people do think this is helpful? I thought I was coming across as excited and curious, which I was until he said that. I didn't care that much about the job and was just exploring my options. I know my worth and I approach interviews more from a "do I even want to work with this people" mindset because I know it's so important for me to like the people I work with and feel respected. I honestly didn't feel that nervous beyond my regular social anxiety of sitting in a room with a person and having to say words at them.
I sometimes read about how to come across confident: eye contact, posture and body language, slow down, pause and think. That's great, but I can't think about all that stuff when I'm trying to be present and communicate my thoughts and listen to someone. My whole issue is I need to to be LESS self-aware, not more. The fact that I'm even engaged in a conversation is a big enough deal for me. Also, I find a lot of people who do all that stuff are less interesting and often irritating (could be my own bias because I can't relate). I find strong eye contact creepy and distracting. I feel that modifying your body language and reading that much into someone else's while you are talking to them is manipulative and presumptuous (beyond basic healthy posture which is good for everyone). I sit weird because and move a lot because I have RLS and adhd, but many apparently assume it's just my anxiety which is really annoying to me. I do see a benefit in slowing down my speech and I want to work on that, but I think intentionally pausing to make people wait is a performative power-move and maybe it works to keep interest on the general population but for me it comes across as disingenuous. Not every social situation should be a Ted talk.
It seems like we are taught to measure our confidence by how well we pretend from the perception of everyone else, when it should just be how accepting we are of ourselves. I want it to be ok to be a human with emotions and nervousness without being pitied, or weak, or being directed about how to improve on being myself. The worst is when people tell you to "just be yourself". As if they know who that is. "Myself" is a socially anxious, quiet and rambling, twitchy weirdo. But if I be that self, apparently that's incorrect? Ok. Having to change everything about me and my mannerisms in order to appear confident seems so backwards when I think about it. I do want to grow and be more confident but as I'm learning to accept myself and find my confidence/inner peace, I see a lot of "advice" that rubs me the wrong way. What if we could just let go of this ideal of seeming conventionally confident and instead just be accept our blank thoughts and rapid speech and shaky hand movements and let go of the pressure to change and control it all? Really what we are trying to control is everyone else's perception of us. And that's not possible. I feel like all we can do is learn to accept ourselves as we are, and then maybe that traditional air of confidence will come or maybe it won't but it shouldn't really matter at that point.
Please validate me with your own thoughts and experiences, or tear this apart and change my mind. I don't want to imply we shouldn't try to push ourselves. But I'm just starting to see "confidence" as yet another ideal that I feel pressured to fit, just like "beauty" and "success". I'm tired of pretending and I'd like to have the confidence to be my anxious self without the shame I feel.
submitted by Firefoxexplorer to socialanxiety [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 tmistry 😍
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2021.10.16 04:50 SeaworthinessOld8856 The stance 😈
2021.10.16 04:50 Zoopy-x3 Servus Leute, falls jemdan die Nintendo Direct zum Animal Crossing Update verpasst hat, ist es kein Streß. Ich hab alle Features und Updates in ein Video gepackt. Schaut gerne rein wenn ihr wissen wollt was euch mit den 2.0 Update erwartet. :)
|submitted by Zoopy-x3 to NintendoDE [link] [comments]|
2021.10.16 04:50 SamEF18 Did you know?
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2021.10.16 04:50 bmitov Unboxing Elegoo Smart Car Arduino Robot KIT Version 4.0 With ESP32 and WiFi Camera
2021.10.16 04:50 Nwkrep82 [USA-NJ] [H] BNIB GIGABYTE Vision OC 3060, BNIB EVGA GeForce RTX 3060 Ti XC GAMING, BNIB EVGA 3070 Ti FTW3 Ultra Gaming, BNIB Z490 ROG MaximuxS XII HERO (WIFI), i9-10900K,EK-Quantum Momentum ROG Maximus XII Hero D-RGB-Plexi Monoblock, EVGA 700 BQ PSU, APPLE Watch Series 5 44mm [W] PayPal, Local Cash
|BNIB GIGABYTE Vision OC 3060 LHR||BNIB. No issues.||https://imgur.com/YFHJKfr||$700 Shipped||1 available|
|BNIB EVGA GeForce RTX 3060 Ti XC GAMING LHR||BNIB. No issues.||https://imgur.com/YFHJKfr||$750 shipped||1 available|
|BNIB EVGA 3070 Ti FTW3 Ultra Gaming||BNIB. No issues.||https://imgur.com/YFHJKfr||$1175 Shipped||1 available|
|BNIB Z490 ROG MaximuxS XII HERO (WIFI), i9-10900K,EK-Quantum Momentum ROG Maximus XII Hero D-RGB-Plexi Monoblock||Motherboard was only removed from box for test fit and power up test. CPU has no issues. Monoblock is BNIB.||https://imgur.com/72y8mXc https://imgur.com/4ImuYAU https://imgur.com/aWEDOdl||Currently selling as a combo. $800 shipped||1 available|
|BNIB EVGA 700 BQ PSU 80+ BRONZE 700W, Semi Modular||BNIB. No issues.||https://imgur.com/PuUu3CU||$55 shipped||1 available|
|APPLE Watch Series 5 (Cellular) 44mm w/ BNIB Black Sport band||Apple watch has no issues. Used on AT&T. Mint condition. Band is BNIB.||https://imgur.com/OrWZhsH https://imgur.com/BFlJ4ZR https://imgur.com/0xTxZvW https://imgur.com/cfGMbEY https://imgur.com/s5OxUSe||$165 shipped||1 available|
|BNIB PlayStation 5 DualSense Wireless Controller (White)||BNIB. No issues.||https://imgur.com/PuUu3CU||$55 shipped||1 available|
2021.10.16 04:50 TheYoung_Wolfman James Tucker - Man I Am
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2021.10.16 04:50 Me-eh What is mankind's greatest creation?
2021.10.16 04:50 Preserve-My-Sanity Is this coconut rotten or just weirdish?
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2021.10.16 04:50 insanegang99 [Hip-Hop/Rap] H3rcules - Runnin It Up
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2021.10.16 04:50 CivilResolution1997 My vasectomy experience: part 3 (of 6) - a couple months post op
# Part 3
Me: age 26 Vasectomy: $599 on August 13, 2021
Part 1 - Initial operation
Part 2 - Two weeks post-op
Part 3 - A couple months post (you are here)
Part 4 - 3-4 months post with (hopefully) negative sperm count test
Part 5 - 1 year
Part 6 - a few years later
Nothing to report honestly. Everything feels completely normal. I don't have pain or any discomfort when walking or ejaculating or anything. I'm back to 100% normal life and nothing feels any different. I ejaculate at least one a day and haven't had any granulomas or swelling at any point.
Hopefully this "no news" update doesn't jinx me or something LOL.
I plan to get my sperm count tested sometime between mid November and mid December.
submitted by CivilResolution1997 to Vasectomy [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 LiL_bongg Just Guapo being a crocodile
2021.10.16 04:50 thatkidrule nikocado avocado😂👑 vs unfunny waterweightphobe Moist Critical🤢🤮
2021.10.16 04:50 error_not_found- I'm 1 year self harm free
It's been a little over a year since I self harmed and whilst I still see the scars every morning it reminds me that I won the battle and am strong for it
submitted by error_not_found- to teenagers [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 TotallySpooky 31F - Feeling blah, looking for company
Happy Friday my little egg McMuffins 💕
See title. My plan is to sprawl myself across my couch and watch Netflix while my cats pretend to ignore me from across the room, but I'd love a little bit of company too. I'm down to talk about most things as long as you're respectful.
Likes: cats, autumn, horror films, spooky stuff in general, 90s everything, girly stuff (haimakeup/nails), organic conversations, and so much more~
Masked up: http://imgur.com/a/J0930wy Cat tax: http://imgur.com/a/gtOX0sx
Please be 29+ :) I'm just looking for folks around my age
submitted by TotallySpooky to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 Splicani_ Me arriving in the Western Australian Goldfields today
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2021.10.16 04:50 j_36912 I would like to speak to this person. Their account was deactivated.
|submitted by j_36912 to Soulnexus [link] [comments]|
2021.10.16 04:50 raisedbysome What’s the over/under on the JBP being named some stupid ass pun?
2021.10.16 04:50 Dear_Elevator Are the chiropractic arts a legitimate medical field? I see equal parts horror stories and people who swear they saved their life. I can't find another medical field like this.
2021.10.16 04:50 sunflower_ninja Day 258 - My brain found a way
I rarely post about my struggles because this is supposed to be how I took care of myself today. I think it's relevant to say that I've been struggling on and off binge eating since May and I currently feel I have no control over the current episode. I found a podcast to offer some insight and my therapist is now back from maternity leave so I have hope, but there's just something different about these urges that I can't seem to tie down. This morning I took all my forms of payment out of my wallet so I couldn't buy anything after work (which is when the urge comes). I still got the urge but it wasn't as bad.
This out of control feeling has really got me down so I actually canceled my plans for this afternoon to sit at home with just me, my dog, and my knitting. I finished my final Christmas towel and I'm so proud of myself for finishing that project :)
After I went to pick up the kids from daycare and school, we stopped to pick up the pizza my husband had ordered. It's the take n'bake kind so they just leave it by the front door so we don't have to go in all the way. I back up into the stall so the baby can see us walk in and the older one can come with since we're not going all the way into the store.
Well, today didn't go as well as pizza pick up usually goes. There were a lot more pizzas than usual there, our receipt wasn't sticking out, I couldn't see the name so I thought ours wasn't there, the baby started screaming he's too little to wear a mask so I can't take him inside the store with me and I couldn't go inside the store to leave him outside crying in the car. This whole time my 3 year old is running around everywhere. I was so flustered and, like usual, on the verge of tears. I texted my husband who confirmed it should be ready, I got the oldest to agree to stay in the front seat instead of come inside with me. I stayed close to the door and yelled for them that I couldn't find my pizza. The dude was unhelpful and I ended up finding it myself.
On the way home I passed my favorite coffee place and realized I can pay with the app through my phone. So my brain found a loop hole in the system that my rational self had put into place earlier in the morning. I'm glad I was able to hold off at least for a couple of hours.
Even though I do something to take care of myself every day, this disorder is making me feel like it's all counterintuitive. I do have hope though and I will delete the app and try again tomorrow.
submitted by sunflower_ninja to NonZeroDay [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 JeniceMontgomery 🔥 Fairlaunch Soon 🔥| 🍀 Play games Get $BNB 💲 | Join us on a new Doge Token | 🏆 +1000 TG members 🐕
💲Welcome to LuckyBabyDoge💲 LuckyBabyDoge is the first Doge Game platform on the Binance Smart Chain network, Play games – Get $BNB
Our links :
🌐 Website : LuckyBabyDoge-token. space
💬 Telegram : t. me/BSC_LuckyBabyDoge
👉🏻 Launch time : 16th of October 2021, 5 PM UTC
LuckyBabyDoge vision is to create a simple and seamless DeFi experience to both crypto savy users and less digitally proficient individuals in China and Southeast Asia. LuckyBabyDoge will be offering a wide range of traditional banking products built on DeFi infrastructure, such as high-return savings account, cryptocurrency vaults, debit cards while keeping users' privacy our top priority.
- Brings DeFi and cryptocurrency to developing markets
- Create a simple and seamless DeFi experience
- Providing alternative banking products to uncertain economies
What is LuckyBabyDoge?
LuckyBabyDoge is an All-in-One DeFi Banking App built on Binance Smart Chain (BSC). Although decentralized finance has generated significant interest in developed countries, we believe that widespread adoption in China, India and Southeast Asia can only happen through the ease of use with mobile applications that combine the possibilities offered by DeFi with safety and privacy.
- LuckyBabyDoge offers mainstream FinTech services with instruments and possibilities of DeFi. Such as high-return savings account, fiat fixed deposit, cryptocurrency vaults, debit cards & transaction mixer.
- Personal banking services to accommodate the needs of risk-averse private investors interested in portfolio diversification and risk assessment.
LuckyBabyDoge offers a solution where retail investors in developing countries can join DeFi with low-entry barriers and a wide range of products such as high- return savings account, fiat fixed deposit, cryptocurrency vaults, debit cards & transaction mixer. LuckyBabyDoge will achieve its vision with its governance and utility token. Earn rewards by staking with LuckyBabyDoge.
More Information :
LAUNCHING: 16/10 at 5 PM UTC
💰 TOKENOMICS 💰 :
💲 Total supply: 1,000,000,000
🥇 Charity: 3% (lock for 6 months, every month unlock 0.5%)
❌ Burn: 4.5%
⚡ Auto buyback and burn - Hold $LuckyBDoge to earn $BNB
💬 Marketing and promotion: 10%
submitted by JeniceMontgomery to SatoshiBets [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 04:50 TheIncontrovert Finally "Finished" Very happen with my wall panels.
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2021.10.16 04:50 thewirdz NO COPYRIGHT MUSIC // LiQWYD - Summer Nights
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